Get UR MAN!
by whitemage2002
Summary: Well, a lot of people debate on Cloud's true love. Tifa or Aeris? Well, maybe this story will help... Please Review!!!


Author's Note: Long time, no see huh?? Well I'm back! Itz summer and I'm bored to death, so, I'm back! Enjoy!!!!! Oh, and just to tell you, don't expect anything fancy from me. I do this for fun, not for the NOBEL PRIZE. Wait… that's science….  
  
  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Final Fantasy VII- "Get Ur Man!"  
  
Opening Song:  
  
100 Bottles of Mountain Dew on the WALL!!! 100 Bottles of Mountain DEW!!! U take all down, drink it all and become EXTREMELY HYPER!!! AND EVENTUALLY BECOME A PYSCHO MANIAC LIKE ME!!!!  
  
Whitemage: oppsie. Wrong song. Sorry!!  
  
THE REAL OPENING SONG:  
  
Dum, Dum, DA DUM!!!!! Ooooohhhhh, get ur man, ooooh oo, get ur man, and kill the other gurl with a nuclear bomb! La la la la, oooooh!!! Do DO!  
  
Hosts:  
  
Rinoa Heartilly  
  
Garnet (aka, DAGGER) Til Alexandros  
  
Special Guests:  
  
None  
  
Participants:  
  
Tifa  
  
Aeris  
  
Cloud  
  
Rinoa: Welcome to the most best and nicest and funniest show on the (forgive me. I forgot what the planet of FF8 was called. :P I'm sooo sorry. Don't flame me on this)…  
  
Dagger: You mean Gaia.  
  
Rinoa: No, I mean, (forgive me. I forgot what the planet of FF8 was called. :P I'm sooo sorry. Don't flame me on this)  
  
Dagger: No, you MEAN GAIA!  
  
RINOA: NO, I MEAN (forgive me. I forgot what the planet of FF8 was called. :P I'm sooo sorry. Don't flame me on this)  
  
Dagger: LOOK, I'M THE SMART ONE HERE! You MEAN GAIA!!!!!!!!  
  
Rinoa: OH, NOW your CALLING ME STUPID???? I MEAN (forgive me. I forgot what the planet of FF8 was called. :P I'm sooo sorry. Don't flame me on this)  
  
Dagger: Oh, YES I AM CALLING you STUPID, DUMBO!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU MEAN GAIA!!!!!  
  
Rinoa: NO, I MEAN (forgive me. I forgot what the planet of FF8 was called. :P I'm sooo sorry. Don't flame me on this) ! AND WHO ARE you CALLING STUPID HUH???? NO ONE! And I mean, NO ONE, calls the GREAT RINOA stupid, u b*%&$!!!!  
  
Dagger: ::turning red:: How dare u call a princess SUCH A FOAL WORD??? Now, you MUST be PUNISHED!!!! ::summons ARK::  
  
Rinoa: Ahhhh!!!!!! ::HP turns to 0::  
  
::A Dog turns up all of sudden::  
  
Angelo: ::Barks angrily at Dagger:: ARF!!!  
  
Dagger: ::Looks at Angelo:: Ohhh, aren't u just PRECIOUS??? Gimmie a kissy wussy!! ::tries to kiss Angelo::  
  
Angelo: ARRRFFF!!!!!! ::Bites Dagger's hand *REAL* hard::  
  
Dagger: AHHHH!!! Owwwiieeee!!!!! You, how DARE you? You shall me punished o, mean dog!! ::Runs to a phone nearby on the set and calls someone:: Hello?? Mommy?? Is that you….  
  
Angelo: ::sweatdrop:: Arfff??? ::runs to find a phoenix down, uses it on Rinoa, and then disappears::  
  
Dagger: ::hangs up the phone, surprised:: NOOO!!!! IT GOT AWAY!!! ::Starts crying:: I feel so unloved….  
  
Rinoa: ::Waking up:: Oww.. that REALLY hurt. ::Starts walking over to crying Dagger:: Soo you wanna play it tough?? Huh, oh your mighty highness??? WE'LL PLAY TOUGH THEN!!!! Lemmie return the favor o, your mightiness! ::Summons Eden::  
  
Dagger: ::Finally looks up:: Huh? Wha?? AHHHHHHHH!!!!! ::Starts running away from Eden::  
  
Eden:: ::sweatdrop:: Is this going to like, take long?? I'm like hired to kill people, not to like, play tag with me, you know!  
  
Rinoa: SILENCE! I SUMMON, YOU DO AS SAID! GET IT????  
  
Eden: ::Gives Rinoa a evil look:: Hmph! How can you be like, so mean?! You made me like, real mad now!!!!! I REFUSE TO FOLLOW YOUR ORDERS UNLESS YOU LIKE DAY, SORRY!  
  
Rinoa: ::sticks tongue out at Eden:: NOOOOOO!!!!!  
  
Eden: ::Turns red:: You like ASKED for it GURLIE!!!! ::Uses attack on the whole set for "Get UR Man!" instead….::  
  
Producer: ::looks up at the incoming attack:: This CANNOT be good….  
  
::BANG! The whole set blows up::  
  
Producer: ::His clothes are all ripped and his face is black:: Time for the backup… ::coughs and faints::  
  
  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
::Couple hours later…::  
  
Producer: Lets do this RIGHT this time! ::looks at Rinoa and Dagger::  
  
Rinoa and Dagger: What???  
  
Producer: Ready, set, ACTION!  
  
::Opening Song Plays::  
  
Rinoa: ::looks at the camera:: Welcome to the BEST and FUNNIEST show on…  
  
Dagger: ::butting in:: GAIA, "Get UR Man!" ::gives Rinoa a evil smile::  
  
Rinoa: ::Gives Dagger a evil look::  
  
Producer: ::thinking:: oh, please, NO!  
  
Rinoa: ::thinking:: oooo, she'll get her punishment later. ::out loud:: Hosted by O, most beautiful girl on Earth, Rinoa Heartilly,  
  
Dagger: and….  
  
Rinoa: ::interrupting:: and a stinky princess DAGGER.  
  
Dagger: ::ignores Rinoa:: Today, on "Get UR Man," we have Tifa, Aeris, and their main man, CLOUD from the great, but not as great as FF9, FF7 world, as our guests!  
  
::Tifa, Aeris, and Cloud walk in. Tifa and Aeris are tugging on Cloud's arms::  
  
Tifa: Get your stinky hand off him you evil B$#%*!!  
  
Aeris: Ah! You get your hand off! HE'S MINE!  
  
Tifa: NO, MINE!  
  
Aeris: MINE!  
  
Tifa: MINE!  
  
Aeris: MINE!  
  
Tifa: MINE!  
  
Aeris: MINE!  
  
Cloud: ::sighs:: why did I agree to come here??  
  
Rinoa: ::sweatdrop:: Well, welcome to "Get UR Man!" a show dedicated to solving the question, "who's boyfriend is he anyway??"  
  
Tifa: MINE!  
  
Aeris: MINE!  
  
Tifa: MINE!  
  
Aeris: MINE!  
  
TIfa: MINE!  
  
Dagger: ::sweatdrop:: umm…. We'll have plenty of time for that later. Why don't you sit down on for now??  
  
Tifa: MINE!  
  
Aeris: MINE!  
  
Tifa: MINE!  
  
Aeris: MINE!  
  
TIfa: MINE!  
  
Cloud: Umm… can we sit down? Please??  
  
Tifa and Aeris: OKAY! ANYTHING YOU WANT!!!! ::Both sits down instantly::  
  
::everyone sweatdrops::  
  
Rinoa: Okkkaaayyyy……  
  
Dagger: Well, lets get this show on the road!  
  
Rinoa: Lemmie explain the point of this whole show first. In this show we will help you decide who is the REAL SOUL mate for your dearest Cloud!!!!  
  
Dagger: Now how will we decide this??? Well, in a way I guess you can call this show a deathmatch.  
  
Rinoa: You see, there are no limitations or rules in this show.  
  
Dagger: So, you have the power to hurt your opponent or even kill her to claim your man on each round. Oh, and before I forget, I better answer my previous question.  
  
Rinoa: HOW WILL WE DECIDE ON THE SOUL MATE???  
  
Dagger: The answer's simple. The last one standing wins. You'll see what this means soon enough.  
  
Dagger and Rinoa: ::smiles evilly::  
  
::Round 1::  
  
Rinoa: Well, let's get this show on the road! ROUND ONE, "IMPRESSSSSSIVE!!!!!"  
  
Dagger: Well, the point of this round is to impress your guy, Cloud in any possible way so you might convince him to pick you at the end of the round.  
  
Rinoa: But there's more!  
  
Dagger: What game show would be fun without any punishments huh?? At the end of the round, the loser will be forced to take on 99,999 points of DAMAGE!  
  
Rinoa: Hey, you're willing to do ANYTHING for your guy, right??  
  
Tifa and Aeris: YEP!!!  
  
Cloud: Ummm….. isn't this going just a tad overboard???  
  
Dagger: Of COURSE NOT! What made you think of such a thing silly??  
  
Cloud: ::sweatdrop::  
  
Rinoa: Yes, you are sooo right Dagger. I mean, we did just change the game a tad bit because of the overwhelming number of deaths. Now you are allowed to use 9 PHOENIX DOWNS.  
  
Dagger: As you can see, the game is perfectly safe. The addition of phoenix downs makes it a bit boring, but safe and fun, fun, fun!!!  
  
  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
TO BE CONTINUED….  
  
  
  
Author's Note: What will happen in this safe game??? Well, you'll have to find out on the next chapter, if I write it. And please, review. Remember, your reviews are what the continuation of this story depends on! 


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